Journals196
Newest
dear Twitter/Tumblr users
3 min read
a friend of mine recently informed me that a bunch of you guys have been reposting my art lately, and i was legitimately shocked when i found out this was being done in a positive light (in the past, whenever my art ended up on other sites, it was usually being made fun of 
) and i gotta say, i couldn't be more pleasantly surprised that after all these years...people have found this old account and liked what they saw ^^
i never expected my drawings to be enjoyed by anybody except the very small niche that was the living airplane/machine community in the 2000s-2010s, so its been pretty amusing to me seeing my stuff being praised for reasons other than the planes themselves XDXD the inner artist in me really appreciates that cuz all these drawings started off as blank pieces of printer paper...EVERYTHING had to be drawn in from scratch, which took a lot of effort for a lazy bum like me, heh, so seeing people complementing the backgrounds, or the vibe of the picture, really makes me happy ^^
my living airplane characters have always been the default form of life in my mind, so what i draw is really no different than what any other artist might do, except in this case the humans are living airplanes XD which is why the settings, things in the background, etc...are all fairly normal (except often filled with things like 1970s decor, tobacciana, things from my real life, movie/video game references...basically just things i like that i tend to throw into my art just cuz i can XD) a few of you mentioned liminal spaces, which is a term i only recently heard of...and i can totally see how some of my stuff can be lumped into that sort of content. i always try to give the backgrounds of my pics a life of their own, they are supposed to be real places after all 
so if the background has a certain vibe to it, thats basically mission accomplished, its a real place now 
but generally the look i give my backgrounds is sorta like a conglomerated mix of 20th century designs, typically leaning more towards the 70s, heh (which is very much like Wes Anderson, one of you mentioned him at some point )
also one of you mentioned Magritte which was appropriate cuz they're probably my favorite artist XD you spotted the subliminal influence very well! =P
this account has been abandoned since 2016...my life and the world have changed so much since then that im not sure i can ever get back into drawing the way i used to (i can hardly draw for my FA account these days...) but yeah, seeing all you guys reposting my art saying how awesome it is really makes me want to dig out my colored pencils again and try doing something new
so yeah, shout out to all you guys for enjoying my old pics and warming this plane's heart with all your kind comments <3 especially you Varg, your post made this account light up like a Christmas tree for the last few days XDXD thanks a million for enjoying my work and sharing it with others ^^ you guys are awesome
also i had no idea Sonicminion and Concordexlover were on twitter, nice seeing you peeps are still around >:3
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ch-ch-ch-ch-changes!
15 min read
so everyday for the last 3 years i've logged into this account and done mostly nothing but lurk, and outside of voting pics into the The Airport or LAF, i dont do much other than post a comment or fave a pic every few months...yet despite all of that, i still feel compelled to log in each and every day...DA was such a big part of my life in my late teens and early 20s i just cant seem to let it go. other plane peeps who were around when i joined have long since deactivated their accounts...and being inactive for so long myself has made me VERY out of touch in terms of whose-who in the living airplane community now. most of my online life is spent on FA and IM programs...the latter of which are often very small circles of contacts that rarely involve interaction as big as it is on sites like DA. and as for FA...that was never everybody's cup of tea there is a living vehicle community there, but its mostly porn (hyper aeromorphs to be exact...which i dont draw and never will) in fact its fair to say if you upload SFW plane art to FA, you'll hardly even be noticed...which i suppose is to be expected on a site that allows NSFW art.
there is a living vehicle community there, but its mostly porn (hyper aeromorphs to be exact...which i dont draw and never will) in fact its fair to say if you upload SFW plane art to FA, you'll hardly even be noticed...which i suppose is to be expected on a site that allows NSFW art.ultimately, i need to accept that the world has changed...DA has changed, the LMC has changed, and i have changed too. it doesnt mean as much to me now that im pushing 30, living on my own, and working 40+ hours at a job i actually enjoy showing up for. there comes a point in everybody's life when their existence IRL becomes more important than their online existence, and accepting that as your reality is something i think is healthy...LightningCato wrote a really good journal explaining a similar situation 
It's like I'm here, but I'm not. “I hate this feeling. Like I'm here, but I'm not.so much of which rings true to anybody who used to be active here, but now mostly lurks.
Like someone cares. But they don't.
Like I belong somewhere else, anywhere but here,
and escape lies just past that snowy window, cool and crisp as the February air.” ― Ellen Hopkins
I'm here. I'm here. I still draw a lot, but mostly doodles and personal work which is mostly on my instagram or not shown at all. I never really noticed how I've only submitted a FEW THINGS per year over the last few years. I feel like I've been drawing up a storm before I draw EVERY night. Well. Nearly. However, I guess I'm a lot slower than I realize. I'll eventually be back open for commissions and all that. I can't say when though as I need some time.
I've come to a weird crossroads in my life. I remember when I used to come on here a lot and just type, just talk as if I was talking to a person. I over shared sometimes, and could be really silly and fun other times, then, suddenly. I just went blank
but...thats not to say i'll ever deactivate my account or anything...i've honestly been wanting to return here for a long time, mostly because working every day as an aircraft mechanic has given me BILLIONS of really good ideas for drawings 
work is such an inspiration to me, and i feel like i waste this inspiration by not giving the ideas i get a proper form (doodles on notebook pages or MSpaint dont count, dammit! ) its just finding the motivation to sit down and draw is becoming harder and harder every year i age, heh, even NSFW pics are becoming difficult for me to draw now...that artistic mojo really is a muscle that needs to be exercised in order to stay strong ._.
work is such an inspiration to me, and i feel like i waste this inspiration by not giving the ideas i get a proper form (doodles on notebook pages or MSpaint dont count, dammit! ) its just finding the motivation to sit down and draw is becoming harder and harder every year i age, heh, even NSFW pics are becoming difficult for me to draw now...that artistic mojo really is a muscle that needs to be exercised in order to stay strong ._.what i need is a fresh start...and having almost 10 thousand messages dating back to 2016 in my inbox is something that i dont think i'll ever properly go through. no, as painful as it sounds i think i'm just gonna have to bomb my message center and return to Inbox Zero, that way i can take baby steps to return here, and maybe even start drawing some of the millions of work related ideas i've gotten since 2016 i'd like to still be a part of the living airplane scene on DA, its just i need to do it in a way an adult in their late 20s can do, vs a teen/tween in high school or college
i'd like to still be a part of the living airplane scene on DA, its just i need to do it in a way an adult in their late 20s can do, vs a teen/tween in high school or college 
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DA supports IP theft
12 min read
thanks to DA's totally unintuitive and overly complicated help desk, people can now no longer report individual users for theft of intellectual property without actually being a representative of said IP. we have the adoption of the DCMA system to blame for this. when trying to report a user for theft of a 3rd party's copyrighted work, you actually get a notice that reads:
"We're Sorry, but we are unable to accept copyright complaints from third parties.
Please direct the copyright holder or their authroized representative to our copyright policy. For educational resources on copyright and for suggestions on going about contacting the copyright holder, click here"
this basically means people uploading screenshots of TV shows or memes can claim it as their own and will completely get away with it, as your average user is not going to be willing to contact the producers behind a mass syndication TV show, or search the internet for the sole creator of a meme.
as if this couldn't be bad enough, trying to submit an actual typed help ticket is virtually impossible now, as the help desk will bounce you around to various FAQ pages and always lead you to a dead end of some sort (often with a "did this help?" survey...)
all of this stems from this miserable fuckhole here: 
who has been uploading screenshots from air disaster documentaries and photos from Airliners.net to various aviation related groups here (along with sonic and nascar related stuff on those groups too). i have reported literally every single pic of his that has appeared in groups i manage, as the fuckhole blocked me so i cant gain access to his actual gallery. yet somehow the little shit has remained alive and well on DA for almost 6 months, continuing to span his stolen pics to groups all over...and DA is letting him get away with it thanks to their new and stupid help desk system and their restrictive DCMA policies
who has been uploading screenshots from air disaster documentaries and photos from Airliners.net to various aviation related groups here (along with sonic and nascar related stuff on those groups too). i have reported literally every single pic of his that has appeared in groups i manage, as the fuckhole blocked me so i cant gain access to his actual gallery. yet somehow the little shit has remained alive and well on DA for almost 6 months, continuing to span his stolen pics to groups all over...and DA is letting him get away with it thanks to their new and stupid help desk system and their restrictive DCMA policies DA...you need to take this motherfucker out, and you need to take him out NOW. and afterwords, you need to actually make it possible to contact an admin via the help desk, because this shit is rampant and 100% on your shoulders. wake the fuck up
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so...its been a while...
16 min read
...not even sure where to begin so much has happened, and continues to happen right now as 2017 slowly comes to a close.
i feel like i need to explain what the last journal was about, for those who didnt ask about it at the time. last year i had a shitbag of a neighbor that was harassing me and my family. it got bad enough that we had to call the police on him, multiple times actually. but the worst part about it was how the police and the landlords practically did nothing, they just turned a blind eye cuz his rich parents paid a year's worth of rent up front, so they could care less what he did...they had their money so they were happy. well after nearly 6 months of feeling like nobody in the universe gave a damn about our suffering he kinda did himself in...first he got drunk and broke into somebody else's apartment, which got him arrested...but somehow he got bailed out and was back home to harass us like nothing had happened. but a month later he got drunk again and locked himself out of his apartment, and in his drunken mind the only way he could get back in was to smash all the windows on the lower level of his place...which got him arrested again and FINALLY caught the attention of the landlords...who evicted him in May of 2017 for damaging their property. so apparently you can violate literally every rule in their lease and have the police called a million times and still stay there so long as your rent is paid...but if you break something, then thats GOING TOO FAR!! not surprising considering the REALLY shady people they've been allowing to move in the for the last 2 years...so basically between September 2016 and May 2017 i was living in the very pit of hell...i actually dreaded coming home after busting my ass at work...it was a living nightmare that im still surprised ended with him getting evicted instead of me murdering him. i was in a really dark place that im still trying to get out of even though he's gone. and even though he was just an immature spoiled brat piece of drunken shit that couldn't perceive the world outside his own little bubble, he ended up becoming an inhuman demon in my mind, and i'd say those 8 months have forever changed me...probably for the worst too
also ive been getting really tired of the going-ons at my job...management there has been getting really nasty lately and its getting to the point where i dont even want to show up anymore...for the past year ive been consistently asked to preform and sign off work ive had no formal training on, under time constraints that are unrealistic, with inadequate tooling and/or under unsafe conditions...AND i have to work under bosses that literally get off to aggravating stressful situations rather than quelling them. we've brought in more money in maintenance this year than at any time since the company formed, and i know cuz i do all the bills...yet the owner pisses the profits away on stupid shit rather than sending some of it our way in the form of raises, or hiring another mechanic(s), which we've needed for at least 2 years now. we're dysfunctional, understaffed, and overworked and its really starting to get to me. we're like bees that spend our whole lives making honey...only to have it taken away from us and sold...plus the longer i stay there, the more i become invested in the company and the harder it will be to leave...this is currently the problem i face job wise. im glad that place hired me nearly 3 years ago and gave a snot-faced noob like me a chance...but now i think its time to move on, i just dont really know where i want to go...i have a decent amount of experience now, its just there are so many things about the general aviation industry in 2017 that frustrate me...sometimes wonder if its even possible to escape the kind of crap im going through at my job now. maybe i just need to get away from FBOs and go somewhere that has its shit together...either an MRO or the airlines, idk >.<
plus im finding my sociopolitical views have been gradually changing since the clusterfuck that was 2016, taking a VERY fatalist and nihilistic turn. how can you maintain party loyalty when you find your party no longer represents you? when every ugly stereotype that you used to joke about suddenly becomes the actual face of your political ideology? its impossible, anybody who tries will eventually lose that battle. in 2017 there is only far-left and far-right dogma, there is no middle ground. each side is an extreme of the other and all its followers political-jihadists. each side is hypocritical and throws shit exactly the same way. both sides have valid points yet both sides chase herrings. basically im done promoting politics of any kind and taking the George Carlin route. they're all fucking toddlers screaming and crying with the rest of the country throwing temper tantrums about garbage only toddlers care about. at this point its gonna take an iron willed dictator to change anything, and at the rate we're going, thats exactly whats gonna happen. everybody is so busy fighting with each other over shit that doesn't matter that we wont notice until its too late, and dont fool yourself...this is a bipartisan effort, nobody's slate is clean...and it isnt even an American problem anymore, this is World Politics 2017
now about my activity here...sharkplane77 is pretty much an abandoned account now. i still log on every day for some reason and lurk, but im probably never gonna be active here again, other than posting journals here and there, or having minor spurts of activity when i feel motivated. am not gonna force myself to draw anything anymore, so if i happen to do a tame pic, yeah i'll upload it here...but that'll be once in a very great while, especially since i hardly even draw adult pics anymore
my FA account is gonna become my main account from now on, hell its already been my main account for at least 2 years anyway so yeah plus IMs too...when im not passed out at my desk or something >.<
so yeah...am still somewhat alive, just not really the same person i was before, the last few years have been really rough ._.
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<da:thumb id="477603721"/>
i feel like i need to explain what the last journal was about, for those who didnt ask about it at the time. last year i had a shitbag of a neighbor that was harassing me and my family. it got bad enough that we had to call the police on him, multiple times actually. but the worst part about it was how the police and the landlords practically did nothing, they just turned a blind eye cuz his rich parents paid a year's worth of rent up front, so they could care less what he did...they had their money so they were happy. well after nearly 6 months of feeling like nobody in the universe gave a damn about our suffering he kinda did himself in...first he got drunk and broke into somebody else's apartment, which got him arrested...but somehow he got bailed out and was back home to harass us like nothing had happened. but a month later he got drunk again and locked himself out of his apartment, and in his drunken mind the only way he could get back in was to smash all the windows on the lower level of his place...which got him arrested again and FINALLY caught the attention of the landlords...who evicted him in May of 2017 for damaging their property. so apparently you can violate literally every rule in their lease and have the police called a million times and still stay there so long as your rent is paid...but if you break something, then thats GOING TOO FAR!! not surprising considering the REALLY shady people they've been allowing to move in the for the last 2 years...so basically between September 2016 and May 2017 i was living in the very pit of hell...i actually dreaded coming home after busting my ass at work...it was a living nightmare that im still surprised ended with him getting evicted instead of me murdering him. i was in a really dark place that im still trying to get out of even though he's gone. and even though he was just an immature spoiled brat piece of drunken shit that couldn't perceive the world outside his own little bubble, he ended up becoming an inhuman demon in my mind, and i'd say those 8 months have forever changed me...probably for the worst too
also ive been getting really tired of the going-ons at my job...management there has been getting really nasty lately and its getting to the point where i dont even want to show up anymore...for the past year ive been consistently asked to preform and sign off work ive had no formal training on, under time constraints that are unrealistic, with inadequate tooling and/or under unsafe conditions...AND i have to work under bosses that literally get off to aggravating stressful situations rather than quelling them. we've brought in more money in maintenance this year than at any time since the company formed, and i know cuz i do all the bills...yet the owner pisses the profits away on stupid shit rather than sending some of it our way in the form of raises, or hiring another mechanic(s), which we've needed for at least 2 years now. we're dysfunctional, understaffed, and overworked and its really starting to get to me. we're like bees that spend our whole lives making honey...only to have it taken away from us and sold...plus the longer i stay there, the more i become invested in the company and the harder it will be to leave...this is currently the problem i face job wise. im glad that place hired me nearly 3 years ago and gave a snot-faced noob like me a chance...but now i think its time to move on, i just dont really know where i want to go...i have a decent amount of experience now, its just there are so many things about the general aviation industry in 2017 that frustrate me...sometimes wonder if its even possible to escape the kind of crap im going through at my job now. maybe i just need to get away from FBOs and go somewhere that has its shit together...either an MRO or the airlines, idk >.<
plus im finding my sociopolitical views have been gradually changing since the clusterfuck that was 2016, taking a VERY fatalist and nihilistic turn. how can you maintain party loyalty when you find your party no longer represents you? when every ugly stereotype that you used to joke about suddenly becomes the actual face of your political ideology? its impossible, anybody who tries will eventually lose that battle. in 2017 there is only far-left and far-right dogma, there is no middle ground. each side is an extreme of the other and all its followers political-jihadists. each side is hypocritical and throws shit exactly the same way. both sides have valid points yet both sides chase herrings. basically im done promoting politics of any kind and taking the George Carlin route. they're all fucking toddlers screaming and crying with the rest of the country throwing temper tantrums about garbage only toddlers care about. at this point its gonna take an iron willed dictator to change anything, and at the rate we're going, thats exactly whats gonna happen. everybody is so busy fighting with each other over shit that doesn't matter that we wont notice until its too late, and dont fool yourself...this is a bipartisan effort, nobody's slate is clean...and it isnt even an American problem anymore, this is World Politics 2017
now about my activity here...sharkplane77 is pretty much an abandoned account now. i still log on every day for some reason and lurk, but im probably never gonna be active here again, other than posting journals here and there, or having minor spurts of activity when i feel motivated. am not gonna force myself to draw anything anymore, so if i happen to do a tame pic, yeah i'll upload it here...but that'll be once in a very great while, especially since i hardly even draw adult pics anymore
my FA account is gonna become my main account from now on, hell its already been my main account for at least 2 years anyway so yeah plus IMs too...when im not passed out at my desk or something >.< so yeah...am still somewhat alive, just not really the same person i was before, the last few years have been really rough ._.
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the claustrophobia of 2017
16 min read
well guys 2017 is here and we can finally leave the toxic sludge of 2016 in the past where it belongs, however for some of us the future doesnt look quite as bright as they would have liked due to lingering events of 2016, but what can you do. we're all trapped on this planet/country/state or region/town/neighborhood/house with no hope of ever leaving. like the Cask of Amontillado we're being sealed in brick by brick every year that passes, while others move about freely sticking torches into the cells of those who are being walled in. however, others might have the opposite problem, always uprooted and nomadic, never finding a place they can call their own. whatever the case may be, we're all victims of claustrophobia, a never ending claustrophobia unlike anything we have experienced before. this feeling overwhelms every thought, it permeates every corner of the mind until its all that exists. from that point on you perceive your life both in the 1st and 3rd person, both looking out of your eyes and as a vaporous entity that seems to hover at varying heights around your head while your claustrophobic mind sweats, bubbles, and shivers like a piece of butter melting in a frying pan. time slows down more than you have ever experienced, or speeds up just as fast, becoming truly relative depending on the mercy of your subconscious. this prolonged claustrophobia is hell itself, a hell not of physical pain but mental pain, and on this planet of purgatory what can you do but endure it until you're so disassociated with yourself you find your mind lost in space while you body ends up in a mental institution, or you lash out at the instigators of this feeling and wind up in prison cuz the law protects people and institutions who torture one another. there is no justice and nobody gets what they deserve.
the solution for most would be to talk to people, however one quickly finds out nobody truly gives a shit unless money is involved; people hear but they dont listen, however the desire to vent to somebody is still strong enough to cause us not to care. we turn to social media and IMing programs only to find they have long since been abandoned, like the ruins of ancient Greece, once a flourishing metropolis but now abandoned hundreds of years ago. people have flocked to inferior sites, inferior programs that are but shadows of their predecessors and disappear into obscurity. like sparks from a welding torch, the people you once relied on for support now scatter and fade into thin air. after so many times witnessing this, you stop even trying to communicate, even when the opportunity is available. you end up lurking like a ghost among the ruins, wanting to speak but not being able to. you are no longer on the same plane of existence, you are not of this world anymore.
then the immediate concern becomes the instigators, the ones who planted the evil seed that grows within your mind, the ones who are solely responsible for your hell, the demons who do nothing but jab the red hot poker into you knowing you wont be able to do anything about it. then an anger begins to grow into a fireball unlike anything you have ever felt, and since your mind has already been eroded you arent bound by the same fears that kept you together in the past. rational solutions become undesirable, what matters is violent, immediate solutions to the problem at hand. karma, retribution, justice are all words you would use to describe your solution, however the ones with the torches would disagree, and no matter how justified your actions were, you will still be institutionalized in some way for breaking a law more important than the ones you instigators were breaking. and you know what...it would be worth it, it would be the most satisfying moment of all your life knowing that for once YOU were the one who won, the one who executed justice when all others failed, when karma itself failed to do its job you became its right hand and executed its will with deadly precision. the one who gave a demon exactly what it deserved, and even if your act of retribution failed to make an example to other demons, you can still live with the satisfaction that at least ONE paid for its actions.
this is what i have to look forward to in 2017...any problem i had in the past is now meaningless. my job and anywhere that isnt the apartment i live in is now heaven and the people i talk to are now holy. i am a hand grenade, they are the pin...they are all holy people and the land that they walk upon holy land
its fair to say that my career on DA is about over. the current state i'm in is so far beyond the ability to come up with new ideas and draw that i dont think i can even start up again if i wasnt living in hell. if anybody wants to know the details about whats going on, note me...
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<da:thumb id="477603721"/><da:thumb id="426528965"/>
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the solution for most would be to talk to people, however one quickly finds out nobody truly gives a shit unless money is involved; people hear but they dont listen, however the desire to vent to somebody is still strong enough to cause us not to care. we turn to social media and IMing programs only to find they have long since been abandoned, like the ruins of ancient Greece, once a flourishing metropolis but now abandoned hundreds of years ago. people have flocked to inferior sites, inferior programs that are but shadows of their predecessors and disappear into obscurity. like sparks from a welding torch, the people you once relied on for support now scatter and fade into thin air. after so many times witnessing this, you stop even trying to communicate, even when the opportunity is available. you end up lurking like a ghost among the ruins, wanting to speak but not being able to. you are no longer on the same plane of existence, you are not of this world anymore.
then the immediate concern becomes the instigators, the ones who planted the evil seed that grows within your mind, the ones who are solely responsible for your hell, the demons who do nothing but jab the red hot poker into you knowing you wont be able to do anything about it. then an anger begins to grow into a fireball unlike anything you have ever felt, and since your mind has already been eroded you arent bound by the same fears that kept you together in the past. rational solutions become undesirable, what matters is violent, immediate solutions to the problem at hand. karma, retribution, justice are all words you would use to describe your solution, however the ones with the torches would disagree, and no matter how justified your actions were, you will still be institutionalized in some way for breaking a law more important than the ones you instigators were breaking. and you know what...it would be worth it, it would be the most satisfying moment of all your life knowing that for once YOU were the one who won, the one who executed justice when all others failed, when karma itself failed to do its job you became its right hand and executed its will with deadly precision. the one who gave a demon exactly what it deserved, and even if your act of retribution failed to make an example to other demons, you can still live with the satisfaction that at least ONE paid for its actions.
this is what i have to look forward to in 2017...any problem i had in the past is now meaningless. my job and anywhere that isnt the apartment i live in is now heaven and the people i talk to are now holy. i am a hand grenade, they are the pin...they are all holy people and the land that they walk upon holy land
its fair to say that my career on DA is about over. the current state i'm in is so far beyond the ability to come up with new ideas and draw that i dont think i can even start up again if i wasnt living in hell. if anybody wants to know the details about whats going on, note me...
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